h1

‘cik’

June 17, 2008

my grandfather passed away last saturday morning. heart attack. had been hospitalized a few times already, even got into coma, icu, transferred to the nearest bed to the doctors and stuff. still he made it, until last saturday.

all of his children got to see him, except for one of my aunt living in klang. poor her, but at least she was back home in kelantan the week before.

abah said that cik (we called our grandfather ‘cik’) was healthy and active as always. the day before he died, he even had the strength to go and collect the fertilizers for his pokok jambu. what willpower. but as the saying goes “ajal maut di tangan Tuhan”.

i was not so close to him, because we go back to kuantan a lot more times thank kelantan. i don’t think he remembered me that well (he has nearly 80 grandchildren!!!). once i was sitting with my baby brother (he was a baby back then), he came to me and looked at me intently. my aut maksu Pah asked him :

cik, tengok sapo tu? kenal dok?

sapo dio nie?

amy la cik, amy anok abe (my father is the first son of the family, everyone calls him’abe’)

hoooo … aku ingat oghe gaji ..

adoiiii … sangat menyedihkan.. anyway, walaupun saya tak rapat dengan cik, saya akan tetap merinduinya. kalau dulu saya balik kelantan, cik mesti akan duduk di beranda di depan rumah, gulung rokok daun dan hisap tanpa pedulikan orang yang lalu lalang. sekarang takde lagi.

saya pasti, abah lebih sedih. sebagai anak lelaki sulung dalam keluarga, mestinya dier lebih rapat dengan cik. saya perasan hal tu. walaupun abah saya tinggal berjauhan daripada ibubapanya berbanding adik-beradiknya, tapi saya perasan, cik jadi gembira dan rajin duduk di rumah bila abah saya balik kampung. sekarang bila cik dah tiada, abah jadi first man dalam keluarganya, bukan sahaja ayah kepada kami adik-beradik, tetapi juga ayah kepada adik-adik dan kakak-kakaknya. bukanlah satu tugas yang mudah nak jaga 3 kakak dan 7 adik, ada yang lumpuh, ada yang miskin, ada yang panas baran, ada yang sangat kaya dan macam-macam lagi kerenah.

most of all, di kala orang lain meraikan ‘hari bapa’ ahad lalu, abah saya kehilangan bapanya. saya sendiri pun sampai sudah tak wish pun abah ‘happy father’s day’. tak sampai hati.

semoga roh cik dilindungi dan ditempatkan di kalangan orang-orang yang soleh. Al-Fatihah.

3 comments

  1. takziah mi. :)b i know your father can do it!


  2. takziah diucapkan..


  3. sorry for your lost~



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