.. defensive ..

December 24, 2007

my ‘almost-ex’ once told me that i am an egoistic person, which, i couldn’t agree more. i dun think my parents brought me up to be so defensive all the time, but i guess living with inferiority-complex for many, many, many years has taught me that sometimes i can’t just let people hurt me. to prevent that, i build ‘walls’ around me, so that not just anybody could come near me without me permitting it. those very few who got access inside the wall are only the people whom i trust with all of my heart. once the trust is broken, i guess he or she is out of the wall forever. i’m not that forgiving in that sense. i lost friends, but i guess i’m okay with that. i just don’t want to take the risk of being hurt again. i don’t know .. i’ve never let anyone who’s opted out to get in again. i guess if i have a company, my job everyday would be firing people all the time just because they pisses me off. *sigh*


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